I Choose Not To Gossip
I choose not to gossip.
I stay away from gossip because it is detrimental to my relationships. Gossip is toxic and hurts everyone involved. In my garden of beautiful blooming relationships, gossip is like a weed that causes my flowers to wilt.
When someone walks up to me and brings up another person, I quickly praise that person and say something positive about him or her to show the gossiper I have no interest in negativity.
I battle the divisive effects of gossip through kindness. I have the power to change the subject when the person I am speaking with starts gossiping.
People who gossip generally do so out of a lack of self-worth. By asking the gossiper questions about their own lives, I communicate a sincere interest in them. This allows us to continue to communicate with each other, not about others.
My genuine friendship meets other’s need for validation and helps them to realize they can be thought of highly without having to put others down. As I ask questions of the gossiper, I stay in control of the conversation by focusing on them.
In cases where someone insists on gossiping, I have the courage to speak up about my feelings. I bluntly state that I avoid talking about people behind their backs. Ultimately, I walk away from people who refuse to be kind.
Today, I choose to speak positively about all people the same way I would want them to speak about me. I try my best to steer people away from gossipy conversations and walk away from those who don’t feel the same way.
Questions for Self-Reflection:
- What is a good topic I can change the subject to if I find myself gossiping?
- What motivates people to gossip?
- How does gossip hurt others?
Gossip- I have dealt with it for years. I hate it. I get sucked in and then regret it, my conscious yelling at me why did I say that! I like how you redirect gossip by “speaking highly of a person”. I find even if I control my tongue listening to it is still toxic. I work in a very toxic gossip enviorment, in fact it makes you one of the “crowd” and uh, I’m talking about people in their 30’s-60’s. I have been praying for a way to be happy at work and not let the gossip into my life. Just don’t do it, right?
Hi Cheryl, thanks for stopping by! I’m unable to tell myself ‘just don’t it’ and have that stick. 🙂 At least it doesn’t work for most things. I have to give myself an alternative to the thing I want to avoid. So I come up with a catch phrase, like, ‘I really don’t have anything to add to that, will you excuse me?’. Or I try to change the subject. If that doesn’t work, I remove myself from the situation. Once I’ve done that a couple times, the gossips don’t tend to include me anymore. And that works for me! I’m much happier in my work when I don’t hear negative stuff. I bet you find something that works for you!